All Women Secretly Love Being Dominated
If you have ever read the comments on an article about consent or courting women, you will likely see the phrase "deep down, all women love to be dominated." I am personally met with inquiries fairly regularly: "Madame, You are a powerful, sexy woman, I bet You just LOVE to let your hair down and take the business end of a whip, or get a firm backhand from an Alpha Male, right?" After all, it would make sense to be a Person-of-Power activity - male CEOs have the stereotype that they all love to get spanked on their sparse days off... why would a boss bitch, especially a Domme, be any different?
For Me, here is why I am different:
Since childhood, when it comes to works of fiction, I always identified much more with the villain of a story than the hero. I did not want to hang out with Ariel, I wanted to be Ursula, the sea witch. Sure, the hopelessly romantic rebel teen girl seemed ostensibly charming, but I would throw her into oncoming traffic to get closer to Ursula. I preferred the evil fairies and the ice queens, even the male villains; the cunning and deviant Scar. Don’t even get Me started on Jafar, that witty, sensual, intelligent, and well-spoken creature. I would have chewed Aladdin up and spit him out. The heroes were hapless dimwits who may have been slightly clever but so much more one-dimensional. They took on the load of heroism at the cost of the complex motive. Going against the grain, rather than always rooting for the victor is more My speed, anyway. I never liked wholesome, except to devour it - in that way, I am a Big Bad Wolf. Even in stories with more than one perceptible villain-type, I tend to find one I adore; I found the Wizard of Oz to be a charlatan, but the true hero was the Wicked Witch of the West (which was confirmed, to My extreme joy, by the play Wicked).
I am attracted to vulnerability. And seeing how much a person is willing to do, in order to please Me. How far down into your spirit can I peer My sharp eyes? And how deeply can I be let in, so that I can swim around your psyche? I appreciate possession; the passion of intense fixation. The stuff that is deemed oh-so-unhealthy by the psychiatrists of yesteryear. Forge your own individual identity, they say - and you should - so that I can absorb its power.
I get along with intellectual male Dominants only when they are calm, cool, and do not try to assert their personalities over Me. It is not that I devalue the role of the submissive - it's that I am in love with the dynamic it creates between U/us. Dominant Madame Rax + Dominant Overeager Jerkoff with Shit to Prove = annoyance. I become rather irritated and wish to disregard the presence of the other so-called Dominant. But when I step into a position of guidance and leadership, I hit transient hypofrontality. A beautiful state of flow that washes over Me like a calm and intense power. I am focused, on point, and hit all of the marks. And it is SO rewarding when I know the other person involved is doing this with all of their agency.
Have I tried submission? Yes. I have tried it, the way a hypermasculine cishet man slips into cross-dressing with hairy legs, broad shoulders, and clunks like a caveman in heels. I have tried it, like learning a foreign language I do not care to pronounce or listen to. I am capable of it, but it is not preferable to Me. When I become incredibly impassioned and excited, I also transform into a more aggressive, hands-on, commanding, bitey creature. In summary, I prefer to be on top (psychologically) at all times.
